Monthly Archives: December 2012

Status Report

Things are nuts. Work has been mad with the end of the year dash.

We (the entire business world, it seems) are rushing like crazy. Everything is due, everything! By the end of the year. No exceptions. Three months ago Alison joined Cement and my world changed. Some of you may remember Alison from Ms. Single Mama. 

It was rough at first. We were exasperated on many occasions during the first two weeks, trying to figure each other out. But it’s all good now and here we are – busy as bees, managing and creating for every client on our own four feet. In tandem, it’s like we are dancing. An old rhythm we had at our old agency. Read More…

9 lessons from a failed marriage

It seems like a lifetime ago, but I was married for 9 years. Obviously, it ended in divorce, so keep that in mind while reading the list below. But, hopefully, you can learn from some of my mistakes. If you have any lessons to add, please add them in the comments. We’d love to hear them. In no particular order, here are 9 lessons from a failed marriage:

  1. Connect daily. My first marriage died of atrophy. I can’t speak for my ex, but I remember desperately looking for time for me. Between, work, kids, and home repairs, it was really hard to find time to write songs, hang out with my brothers, or play the occasional video game. By about the end of marriage year 3 is when I think I lost my focus. I spent more effort on time for me, than finding a healthy balance. Looking back, I think it was a defense mechanism. I was tired of being hurt– my ex didn’t wan’t to go out because she was worried about spending the money, and over time, that starts to hurt. It’s probably worth spending a few dollars on a sitter, packing a meal, and going to a park. Connecting doesn’t have to mean going out (although, that’s important, too). Connecting means a touch on the shoulder. A kiss for no reason. A compliment. Asking questions. A conversation that doesn’t involve kids or work. Connecting doesn’t mean talking about logistics. Logistics is something even (some of) the most dysfunctional exes can discuss. Find a way to really connect with your spouse/significant other every single day.
  2. It’s ok to fight (but do it respectfully). It’s a good thing to be passionate. It’s ok to be angry, hurt, sad, really pissed off, whatever. It’s good to express those feelings. It’s always ok to make “I” statements: “I was/felt sad, angry when you said/did [fill in the blank].” Screaming, hurtling insults, sulking? Not so much.
  3. Learn how to apologize the right way. “I’m sorry you felt Read More…

In the spirit… holiday giveaway.

Because it’s that time of year…

Leave a comment (that’s it) and one of you will win my latest thrifting score. A Sak purse, absolutely perfect for that holiday party!

And a new leaf necklace.

PS. I have plenty of pieces and parts in. Order now (before Sunday 12/16) and I can get them to your before Christmas! I make them myself, you know. I’m your little formerly single mama, happily and incredibly blended mama elf.

xoxo,

Alaina

 

Step-brothers or brothers?

It’s hard to tell anymore.

They love each other like brothers and they fight like brothers.

This bout in the thrift store ended with Cohen throwing punches at Benjamin and me shouting from the register for them to “cut it out!” That’s what happens when you’re two months apart, the same size and when you know exactly how to set each other off.

Seth spent an entire day, today – a Saturday – out at a concealed carry class. And after one day straight with them, alone, I feel completely exhausted and drained of any will to live. I would rather be in the office working any day. Call me a rotten mom or an evil step-mother, but I could never, ever be a stay at home mom (or dad) and I commend all of you who are.

A few things to share:

1. Our Holiday card to all of you. Smiles guaranteed.
2. And, a fantastic behavior app for kids called Beep Boop. Give the kids a beep or a boop, tally them up at the end of the day – reward accordingly. Seth and I’s apps are completely synced so we don’t have to add the points in our head and share later. Love it and highly recommend to all of you mamas out there, who may – like me – be a tad exhausted.

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