Monthly Archives: September 2012

Great lengths.

Today Seth’s beard said good bye to the world.

I took this picture before he went into the bathroom with the razor.

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Phew. I hope his beard growing kicks are at peace for a while.

Best year ever

One year ago today I met the most amazing woman ever.

Our hands shake as we pour sugar in our coffees.

We talk for hours. And laugh.

We walk to Jeni’s, cialis 40mg get ice cream, treat and talk and laugh and smile some more.

It’s time to leave. She walks a few steps down the alley. Turns, dark brown curls bobbing.

Smiles.

That’s it. I’m hooked.

A month later we’re cowboys and aliens for Halloween. Still laughing.

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A year later, and I’m more hooked than ever.

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-Seth

Does it matter what your friends think?

Before I married my ex-husband, online a quick rapid marriage to earn a Green Card and because we were totally youthfully and blissfully in love, one of my long-time high school and college friends asked me to meet her for a drink.

I hadn’t seen her in a while and she wasted no time cutting to the punch, “You shouldn’t marry him, Alaina. You really, really shouldn’t. This is a huge mistake, you just met him.”

“I know, you’re not the only one who think that, but I know it will be fine. You just have to trust me.”

As you all know, if you’ve read your history on Ms. Single Mama, it wasn’t. Far from it, my first marriage wasn’t just unpleasant it border lined on abusive and it took me years to mentally rebuild.

I always thought back to that conversation and several others with concerned family members, all of which I had ignored. And I thought, “What if? What if I had listened to those in my life who loved me the most.”

There were many more relationships between my ex and Seth, also all documented over at MSM. And in each case my friends were accepting of them but fell short of encouraging them or being excited. They were being polite and keeping their mouths shut. But eventually that spills over and the truth surfaces, no matter how hard you try to brush it under the rug.

My own sister, Anna, is the one who sparked John and I’s break up when she asked him questions about our relationship. She was concerned. She didn’t think it was the right fit and as angry as I was with her at the time, now I can’t thank her enough for butting her nose into my business.

And when it happened, I listened, remembering what I had learned the first time. In fact, I called an emergency meeting with Mia and Anna on Christmas Eve morning. And there they both told me in no uncertain terms that they did not think John and I should be together.  Read More…

So, that’s where babies come from…

Yes, cheapest shop I ride a motorcycle. But most of the time I’m doing other things. Like having a dude’s day last Sunday– just me and the boys.

Playing with remote control airplanes that Uncle Ben bought

Flying toy planes

Going back around the block to show Cohen and Benjamin Darth Van, website like this the Automobile Menace

Darth Van, <a href=viagra the Automobile Menace (Star Wars van)” width=”614″ height=”614″ />

Bribing them with bacon double cheeseburgers to get them into Whole Paycheck Whole Foods so I can get a few groceries.

boys smiling in Whole Foods

Oh, and taking pictures while my brother fishes that plane out of the tree.

toy plane stuck in a tree

Of course, there’s laundry to do, lunches to pack, dogs to walk, leather bags to make. All the ordinary chores that go along with a family of 5. But days like this make it all worth it.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

-Seth

 
Yes, site I ride a motorcycle. But most of the time I’m doing other things. Like having a dude’s day last Sunday– just me and the boys.

Playing with remote control airplanes that Uncle Ben bought

Flying toy planes

Going back around the block to show Cohen and Benjamin Darth Van, prostate the Automobile Menace

Darth Van, <a href=viagra dosage the Automobile Menace (Star Wars van)” width=”614″ height=”614″ />

Bribing them with bacon double cheeseburgers to get them into Whole Paycheck Whole Foods so I can get a few groceries.

boys smiling in Whole Foods

Oh, and taking pictures while my brother fishes that plane out of the tree.

toy plane stuck in a tree

Of course, there’s laundry to do, lunches to pack, dogs to walk, leather bags to make. All the ordinary chores that go along with a family of 5. But days like this make it all worth it.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

-Seth

 
Yes, view I ride a motorcycle. But most of the time I’m doing other things. Like having a dude’s day last Sunday– just me and the boys.

Playing with remote control airplanes that Uncle Ben bought

Flying toy planes

Going back around the block to show Cohen and Benjamin Darth Van, site the Automobile Menace

Darth Van, <a href=about it the Automobile Menace (Star Wars van)” width=”614″ height=”614″ />

Bribing them with Read More…

The Evil Step-Mother

We learn a lot around here, pharm all of us. We’re blending, viagra sale damn it, pharm and it’s not easy.

Aside from the very tangible experience of learning how to live with each other and share one bathroom, there’s the larger issue and stark reality of shared parenting and adjusting to life post-divorce. For Cohen and Lily, going from one house to another is not easy. And it’s not for easy for Seth either.

Personally, having never had to truly share Benjamin, that is new territory for me as well. All I can say is that divorce, as awful as this sounds, must be easier when the kids are too little to know what is going on. Benjamin, as some of you may recall, was four months old. And while that had its own set of challenges, parents of older children going through a divorce have it even harder.

My hat’s off to all of you.

As for me, the only thing I can do is wait patiently and do the best I can to encourage open, positive communication between all of us. We’ll get there and all adults are making a concerted effort to do so.

Oh, and then the three kids have their own relationships between each other.

As you can imagine, Seth and I are constantly tuned in on a daily basis–who needs a special outing with just their Dad today? Or who needs to talk or spend one-on-one time with me or Benjamin?

When all else fails, I break out a puppet. Pat the Cat is my go-to. The gender neutral child’s best friend. I don’t know why Pat is gender neutral, I just thought it would be funny to have the kids guess when they asked and then it sparked an entire conversation that took me back to my days in women’s studies classes at OU.

But seriously, the kids will tell anything to Pat even though she is clearly sitting on my arm. It’s incredible. Try it if you are trying to get them to open up about their feelings.

Aside from all of that serious business we also learned that knock off crocs don’t last. That Lily would like to be She-Ra for Halloween and that 80’s cartoons are just as awesome now as they were then.

That six and seven year olds can feed themselves breakfast, but not without a few spills. That if American Girl emails you to sample a movie kit for the new McKenna Shooting for the Stars DVD and you say “yes” you’ll end up with a box bursting with dozens of samples.

The boys have learned that toys can mysteriously appear at the door. Giant boxes of toys. I explained carefully that American Girl had emailed us and that it was a bit of a fluke. They seemed to understand that and then asked me to tell Lego and G.I. Joe they are more than willing to offer a review. Needless to say Lily gives the American Girl doll crafts a two Lily thumbs up.

We’ve learned that many people assume many things about us and are quick to judge. We’ve learned that ignoring them is definitely the best policy.

We’ve learned that many of you think Uncle Ben is hot. I have to agree, my brother-in-law is as advertised and definitely packs a whole lot of handsome on a daily basis.

However, we are going to keep him and his relationship status a continued mystery as it is a bit “complicated.” In the meantime, you can still keep dreaming…

I have learned that bikers actually clean those things.

I also learned that even though I can remember it like it was yesterday, the day my little sister kicked her boyfriend in the you know whats was actually 23 years ago. 

P.S. That little spit fire of a girl grew up and earned her masters in Creative Writing from University of Virginia. She put her feet to better use later as a soccer and track star in high school and later at the University of Iowa. When Anna wrote that she was just a few years older then Lily.

We also sent the kids off to their first days of school (first grade for the boys, second for Lily). In which we learned that Lily looks even taller in her little one inch wedges and that all three of them play just a hard as they fight.

[P.S. Lily’s Oilily dress is from the thrift store!]

The best anecdote about parenthood I ever read is this–the days are long but the years are fast. I’m hoping this blog (which forces me to spend hours re-hashing and digging up pictures) will be something they can all read later to help preserve all of this. Because, in spite of it all, this has to be one of the best times in our lives.

 
We learn a lot around here, buy more about all of us. We’re blending, damn it, and it’s not easy.

Aside from the very tangible experience of learning how to live with each other and share one bathroom, there’s the larger issue and stark reality of shared parenting and adjusting to life post-divorce. For Cohen and Lily, going from one house to another is not easy. And it’s not for easy for Seth either.

Personally, having never had to truly share Benjamin, that is new territory for me as well. All I can say is that divorce, as awful as this sounds, must be easier when the kids are too little to know what is going on. Benjamin, as some of you may recall, was four months old. And while that had its own set of challenges, parents of older children going through a divorce have it even harder.

My hat’s off to all of you.

As for me, the only thing I can do is wait patiently and do the best I can to encourage open, positive communication between all of us. We’ll get there and all adults are making a concerted effort to do so.

Oh, and then the three kids have their own relationships between each other.

As you can imagine, Seth and I are constantly tuned in on a daily basis–who needs a special outing with just their Dad today? Or who needs to talk or spend one-on-one time with me or Benjamin?

When all else fails, I break out a puppet. Pat the Cat is my go-to.

The gender neutral child’s best friend. I don’t know why Pat is gender neutral, I just thought it would be funny to have the kids guess when they asked and then it sparked an entire conversation that took me back to my days in women’s studies classes at OU.

But seriously, the kids will tell anything to Pat even though she is clearly sitting on my arm. It’s incredible. Try it if you are trying to get them to open up about their feelings.

Aside from all of that serious business we also learned that knock off crocs don’t last. That Lily would like to be She-Ra for Halloween and that 80’s cartoons are just as awesome now as they were then.

That six and seven year olds can feed themselves breakfast, but not without a few spills. That if American Girl emails you to sample a movie kit for the new McKenna Shooting for the Stars DVD and you say “yes” you’ll end up with a box bursting with dozens of samples.

The boys have learned that toys can mysteriously appear at the door. Giant boxes of toys. I explained carefully that American Girl had emailed us and that it was a bit of a fluke. They seemed to understand that and then asked me to tell Lego and G.I. Joe they are more than willing to offer a review. Needless to say Lily gives the American Girl doll crafts a two Lily thumbs up.

We’ve learned that many people assume many things about us and are quick to judge. We’ve learned that ignoring them is definitely the best policy.

We’ve learned that many of you think Uncle Ben is hot. I have to agree, my brother-in-law is as advertised and definitely packs a whole lot of handsome on a daily basis.

However, we are going to keep him and his relationship status a continued mystery as it is a bit “complicated.” In the meantime, you can still keep dreaming…

I have learned that bikers actually clean those things.

I also learned that even though I can remember it like it was yesterday, the day my little sister kicked her boyfriend in the you know whats was actually 23 years ago. 

P.S. That little spit fire of a girl grew up and earned her masters in Creative Writing from University of Virginia. She put her feet to better use later as a soccer and track star in high school and later at the University of Iowa. When Anna wrote that she was just a few years older then Lily.

We also sent the kids off to their first days of school (first grade for the boys, second for Lily). In which we learned that Lily looks even taller in her little one inch wedges and that all three of them play just a hard as they fight.

[P.S. Lily’s Oilily dress is from the thrift store!]

The best anecdote about parenthood I ever read is this–the days are long but the years are fast. I’m hoping this blog (which forces me to spend hours re-hashing and digging up pictures) will be something they can all read later to help preserve all of this. Because, in spite of it all, this has to be one of the best times in our lives.

 
I thrift, capsule therefore I save. Lots and lots and lots. But, pills for me, it’s more then just saving piles of cash – it’s about the hunt, the thrill of the chase and satisfying my constant desire to be wearing something new, cute and fashion forward.

Like this top combo…

The tank and the necklace were both from a local thrift store.

I first discovered thrift shopping in high school. My friends and I would hunt of cool t-shirts, flannels and jeans to rip apart. I have since lost most of those t-shirts, but would give an arm and a leg for any one of them back. Now finding a great t-shirt in a thrift store still alludes me. T-shirts are often picked through as thrifting has become so incredibly popular over the years.

So, instead of focusing on the rows and rows of t-shirts in a thrift store, I head straight for the less frequented sections.

Here are my tips on making the most of your thrift shopping experience. And thanks to the Volunteers of America for sponsoring this post. They gave, Jess and I a $50 gift card to shop to our heart’s content. The goal? To find as much as could for under $50.00. Read More…

The beard.

I always wanted a man with a beard.

I am certain it’s because my Dad had one. Freud, sure. And simply the fact that he was an absolutely incredible man and father. So, here I am, a grown woman who digs beards.

I got what I wished for in Seth. He is committed to growing his beard out (in spite of my protests) for as “long as it takes”.

We will document his beard’s transition here…

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The perfect fall cami. A contest.

For one of you, my sweet readers. This is small and petite. It fits me (size 4/6 on top) but the chest seam is too high. It’s vintage. And clearly, completely awesome. It would be perfect with cute pink jeans or a high waisted skirt.

Enter with a comment (just say anything) and I will draw a random winner on Sunday, September 9th.

Black and white fall camisole

And, PS, to the right of my mirror, you’ll see a sweet little picture Benjamin drew of Seth and I when we first met. Cuteness!

Good luck!

xoxo

Alaina

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