One year ago today I met the most amazing woman ever.
Our hands shake as we pour sugar in our coffees.
We talk for hours. And laugh.
We walk to Jeni’s, get ice cream, and talk and laugh and smile some more.
It’s time to leave. She walks a few steps down the alley. Turns, dark brown curls bobbing.
That’s it. I’m hooked.
A month later we’re cowboys and aliens for Halloween. Still laughing.
A year later, and I’m more hooked than ever.
Before I married my ex-husband, a quick rapid marriage to earn a Green Card and because we were totally youthfully and blissfully in love, one of my long-time high school and college friends asked me to meet her for a drink.
I hadn’t seen her in a while and she wasted no time cutting to the punch, “You shouldn’t marry him, Alaina. You really, really shouldn’t. This is a huge mistake, you just met him.”
“I know, you’re not the only one who think that, but I know it will be fine. You just have to trust me.”
As you all know, if you’ve read your history on Ms. Single Mama, it wasn’t. Far from it, my first marriage wasn’t just unpleasant it border lined on abusive and it took me years to mentally rebuild.
I always thought back to that conversation and several others with concerned family members, all of which I had ignored. And I thought, “What if? What if I had listened to those in my life who loved me the most.”
There were many more relationships between my ex and Seth, also all documented over at MSM. And in each case my friends were accepting of them but fell short of encouraging them or being excited. They were being polite and keeping their mouths shut. But eventually that spills over and the truth surfaces, no matter how hard you try to brush it under the rug.
My own sister, Anna, is the one who sparked John and I’s break up when she asked him questions about our relationship. She was concerned. She didn’t think it was the right fit and as angry as I was with her at the time, now I can’t thank her enough for butting her nose into my business.
And when it happened, I listened, remembering what I had learned the first time. In fact, I called an emergency meeting with Mia and Anna on Christmas Eve morning. And there they both told me in no uncertain terms that they did not think John and I should be together. Read More…
Benjamin gasps and then looks at me in shock,”Mom!”
We are relaxing on an afternoon after school. Me reading on the couch and Benjamin working on homework in the dining room just a few feet away.
“I just realized something.” He is an advanced conversationalist, for a six-year-old, and articulates every point precisely.
“When my real dad married my step-mom she had a baby. But when they met she already had my step-brother.”
“So, you already had me and then you married Dad, so that means you are going to have a baby!”
“Is that so?”
“Yes! Oh my gosh, Mom, you are totally going to be pregnant soon! I can’t even believe it!”
He looks at me and nods his head in complete certainty.
I haven’t seem him this excited since last Christmas. It does make sense. Clearly…
Yes, I ride a motorcycle. But most of the time I’m doing other things. Like having a dude’s day last Sunday– just me and the boys.
Playing with remote control airplanes that Uncle Ben bought
Going back around the block to show Cohen and Benjamin Darth Van, the Automobile Menace
Bribing them with Read More…
She is everywhere.
The evil step-mother in Snow White, Cinderella, Rapunzel (technically not a step-mother, but acts as one). Who else? I’m sure I’m leaving a few big ones off the list. Step-mothers have an awful, awful reputation and are often the scape goat of blame for many blended family issues.
Yesterday in the car Lily and I were on a much anticipated trip to Target. Just the two of us. Almost before we were out of the driveway a week’s worth of thoughts poured out of her head. The day before I had lost my temper when she and Benjamin and I went to DSW hunting for children’s shoes. After finding out they don’t have any there we had to leave the store empty handed and the two of them were both grumbling and whining about “not getting anything.” As a step-mother who is borderline spoiling all of them with gifts and clothes I should have taken a deep breath and blamed myself for their behavior but instead I said, “You two are acting like spoiled brats.”
I try to never do this. But it happens. We have three kids. We have a lot on our plates and every once in a while, one of us loses it. And today it was my turn. I calmed myself in the car and then explained what I meant.
“You are wonderful, beautiful people. You are. But what I saw in there, wasn’t you. I don’t know who those kids were and I can’t believe you were acting like that. So, we’re going home. No Build-A-Bear, no Lego store adventure. Home.”
The car ride home was silent and Lily was devastated. Not because we couldn’t go to the stores, because she really isn’t a spoiled brat. She’s not. She’s one of the kindest, sweetest little girls I have ever met. She was upset because I had lost my temper at her. Read More…
I always wanted a man with a beard.
I am certain it’s because my Dad had one. Freud, sure. And simply the fact that he was an absolutely incredible man and father. So, here I am, a grown woman who digs beards.
I got what I wished for in Seth. He is committed to growing his beard out (in spite of my protests) for as “long as it takes”.
We will document his beard’s transition here…
“Dad? Where are the Lego destructions?” Benjamin asks me.
“The what?” I reply, obviously understanding he means Read More…
For one of you, my sweet readers. This is small and petite. It fits me (size 4/6 on top) but the chest seam is too high. It’s vintage. And clearly, completely awesome. It would be perfect with cute pink jeans or a high waisted skirt.
Enter with a comment (just say anything) and I will draw a random winner on Sunday, September 9th.
And, PS, to the right of my mirror, you’ll see a sweet little picture Benjamin drew of Seth and I when we first met. Cuteness!